Thursday, March 08, 2007

I carried a watermelon

The other night, I carried a watermelon. Well, not literally. My girlfriends and I use the "I carried a watermelon" phrase to describe a situation where we probably didn't say the best thing. A foot in mouth kind of thing. Where you say something, quickly, either in response to a question or even as a conversation starter. But what you say isn't smooth. And really not suave, not in the very least. Actually, you end up feeling like an idiot, and probably sound like one. It's that, did I really just say that, outloud? feeling of embarrassment. You know what I'm talking about.

Ok, maybe you don't know what I'm talking about. So I'll setup the scene of the phrases origination, and even post a little visual aid as well. It's about 4:00 minutes in. But watch the whole scene, because who doesn't love Dirty Dancing?

Baby goes into the staff quarters with Johnny's cousin. To get in there she well, carries a watermelon. Johnny's cousin is juggling two up the walkway, when Baby walks by, sees him struggling, and offers to help. Cousin tells Baby she can't go with him, she talks him into it, and they enter the staff quarters where everyone is, well, dirty dancing. Johnny notices cousin and Baby standing on the side of the dance floor, and is all, "Yo, cuz, what's she doin' here?" Cuz says she's with him, and Baby says the first thing that comes to mind, blurting out, "I carried a watermelon." Johnny just looks at her, in his too many unbuttons undone white shirt, and says nothing, and walks (dances?) away. Then we see Baby, mocking herself saying, "I carried a watermelon?" In complete disbelief that she actually just said that, to him, out loud.

Now go ahead, watch for yourself:

That's the scene in the movie. Baby thinks Johnny is cute, she gets nervous, and says the first thing that comes to mind. Which is exactly what I did the other night.

If you haven't heard of Jim Bianco, you must. Google him. Download him. Make him your screensaver or wallpaper. I did. If I had to say my "type" of guy, it's him. His clothing, his hair, his whole way. His body and his vibe. Man, and his voice. His sweet, raspy voice. And he plays the guitar. Lord knows I'm a complete sucker for a guy who can play the guitar.

He has toured with the likes of Joshua Radin, Joe Purdy, Rachel Yamagata, Kate Havnevik, Cary Brothers, Schuyler Fisk, Imogen Heap, and Gary Jules. I saw him this fall at the Hotel Café tour and when I saw he was in the area again I couldn't miss the opportunity.

Much as I couldn't miss the opportunity, after his amazing set, to scope him out in the back of the lounge, and go up to him, to say something. I had no idea what. Nothing that came to mind seemed even the least bit appropriate. I don't usually get nervous, generally, around guys. About what to say or do or whatever. But this was different. He is so talented, and so incredibly good looking. I was totally into his performance and HIM, so I had to take this chance to at least say... something.

You were good. That is what I said as I "pretended" to walk to the ladies room and accidentally "noticed" him on the way there. Yeah. I carried a fucking watermelon. Who says "you're good?" And that's pretty much all I said. He smiled, nodded. I got fidgety and put my hands in my pocket and touched my hair too much. I quickly went on to tell him that I had seen him at the other tour, and that they were good then too. He smiled, but didn't say anything. I was Baby and he was Johnny. Then he looked up, asked my name, and extended his hand. Yes! We touched. I introduced myself to his band member buddy, and told them, for the third time, that they did a really good job.

And I carried a watermelon. Sure, I sounded completely dumb and nervous and I looked fidgety. Maybe that's just me. Around someone like that. I couldn't help myself. But at least I got to meet Jim Bianco. Even if I was a Baby about it.


angel, jr. said...

That wasn't really carrying a watermelon. Well maybe you carried a pineapple (why did I just say that?). It wasn't that bad.

Ally said...

I knew immediately when I saw the post title!! I love Dirty Dancing, except that scene b/c I feel awkward for Baby.

e.b. said...

That is too funny. Did you have any more interactions with him?

brookem said...

Angel- maybe it's more carrying a pinapple. Ha!

Ally- How can anyone NOT love that movie? I felt bad for her too.

eb- No other interactions, unfortunately. Sucks he lives in California and I'll probably never see him again. Oh well!

Anonymous said...

Such a great movie! I loved it! Don't feel bad about carrying the watermelon, it wasn't really a watermelon....more a pineapple like Angel said.

Trixie said...

That's so funny! I've never heard of that phrase "carrying a watermelon"...

He's cute by the way. ;)

brandy said...

Dirty Dancing. Man. I love that movie. And I also like any man who layers his clothes like your man posted. Layering. It's right up there with being employed in my books.

dionna said...

I've seen that movie a thousand times - what a great phrase! And I wouldn't say you goofed that bad :)

Thomas said...

I carried a watermelon once. I was at the grocery store and my sister called and asked if I could get a watermelon. One thing led to another and pretty soon I was carrying a watermelon.

brookem said...

ruby- a classic, for sure.

trixie- ha, bring the phrase to your neck of the woods and we can see it spread! ... wicked cute, huh?

brandy- I could NOT agree more. Layering is absolutely key.

dionna- it felt dumb at the time, but you're probably right!

thomas- see? it's bound to happen to just about anyone, at least at some point or another.

Tom said...

Hey, as long as Baby didn't get put in a corner, I'd say you did well. :)

Have you heard of The Jayhawks? I've been listening to them for a dozen years or so, and a couple years ago I got to meet them, get an autograph, etc. but it wasn't an autograph line, they were just standing around the venue after their set. I walked up to the lead singer/guitarist Gary Louris, shook his hand and asked for an autograph but then my mind went blank. I remember the look on his face, like he knew I wanted to say "Oh, man you guys are the best, etc etc etc" and he kinda grinned like "ooooo-kay"

If I had it to do over again, I'd ask to join the band and play an extra guitar... or the cowbell.

brookem said...

tom- no one puts baby in the corner! im glad im not the only one who has watermelon run ins with band members.
thanks for stopping by.

Anonymous said...

I have to tell you that I carry a watermelon at least 3-4 times a day!-Jaymez

k.r.i.s.t.e.n. said...

haha, fun to read! and don't worry, we've all been there.

Natasha said...

Hey! I finally posted a new entry in my blog!

PeeJ said...

Dang, if there was ever a perfect phrase to describe fluffing it in front of an objet d'amour, "Carrying a watermelon" is it.

Most guys will not admit to watching Dirty Dancing. I must admit I was pretty much forced into it by an ex, I think stapled into a chair, eyes held open "Alex" style (as in Alex / Clockwork Orange). But hah, yes that's just peachy and a great description.

btw anyone who can play a musical instrument = instant object of desire unless it's the Tuba.


Aaron said...

You palmed him your telephone number, didn't you? :D

Trina said...

Hey :) I guess we all carry a watermellon sometimes; I bet Jim B. was amused. No one puts Baby in the corner!

brookem said...

Jaymez & Kristen- I knew it wasn't just me!

Peej- I love that you've seen it!

Aaron- I didn't. I couldn't. He's this hot musician from LA and I'm just a regular girl groupie from Mass. It wouldn't have gotten me far, I doubt.

Trina- You're damn right we do. And he should be. And no they don't!

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