Friday, May 11, 2007

It's like rain on your wedding day

Even if you are coupled up, you can imagine this. I know you can get this scene. Because even when you're coupled, you remember your single times. Nights spent in bars surrounded by your friends and/or random couples all over each other, ohsohappily in love. RSVPing as a single to a wedding because you certainly aren't going to bring the person you're just casually dating (or doing whatever with), to your Uncle's wedding. You remember these times. They were big parts of your single years, so I know you'll get this.

Tonight I was all around couples and love and engagements and happiness. First it was dinner with a college friend who has apparently found happiness with Mr. Long Distance Man. Sure long distance isn't ideal, but for them it is working because it has to, for now. And she seems happy, and they're cute in their posted pictures online, and all seems really so good.

Later in the evening it was at one of my dearest friend's new condo. With her fiance. I'm in this wedding one year from now, and really, I couldn't be happier for them. He's just about one of the greatest guys ever, and she deserves that, truly. I just love this girl to pieces and she deserves this happiness.

So in I walk with my 18 pack of Coors Light, bust right into that and they're going down like water on this humid night, and I begin chatting with my dear friend's sister. Who I'm also friends with. Who, what do you know, is also engaged. And she seems happy, and they're giggly as he's tickling her and she's showing me her gorgeous ring and that's really fine as I reach for more Sunchips.

Oh and now I'm hearing wedding bells actually ringing as happy in love couple number three comes in. Also engaged. On to the next beer I realize, as I hear, "do you have a date" tossed among happily coupled up partners, that I am the only single in a group of 7. This doesn't totally phase me, I even chuckle a bit to the thought of this scenario as chug another sip. Truth be told, I'm neither ecstatic or depressed about it all. It's the facts and I'm having a good time and so it goes. I am that friend that can mix well in these situations and damn it I'm happy for these people.

And for single to slap me in the face just a few more times, let's discuss the ride home. First it was getting lost, and ending up in the exact neighborhood, pretty spot on to the guy who ever so casually blew me off a few weeks ago. And that's as fine as can be, because it's a breezy night and Van Morrison is blaring and really what bad mood comes from Van Morrison? None I tell you. Things are fine.

And then it's the truck that pulls up right next to me. The same exact truck that an ex from years, long long time ago years, drove to a wedding that we once attended. And left to get freaky yo', in the back of that beast. And so my friends now joke, "when the truck's a rockin..."

Still fine, and when three men pull right up next to me now in motorcycles, the same one that a certain far off friend took me for a ride on this summer, I'm really pulled together and feeling great and loving life, like totally.

And I make it home, pull in the driveway, and now I'm just feeling like bed is screaming my name. And it's hot and it's humid and fuck I dropped my keys. Where's the damn hallway light? My contacts need out. I need in, my bed. Right now. I feel like my drive home soundtrack should have been Alanis Moorisette's Ironic even though I don't even like her music, it's just fitting right? Instead it's more of the Coldplay variety which is fine, swell really, but perhaps a little too mellow. And when I accidentally hit 96.1 and get Delilah I just about throw up in my mouth a little.

So I get inside, slip into this new ditty I got to wear to bed. And I never, I mean pretty freakin rarely, do I sign online anymore. And the clincher of all of this, after months of time to move on, even more than a year really, is getting an IM from that ex. Really because why not wrap it all up with a conversation with him, right? Because on a night like this, it all seems to just have that way of not surprising me in the freaking least.

19 comments:

brandy said...

Being slapped in the face by single isn't fun. But I agree about the Van Morrison, it's hard to feel bad when he's on. I'm sorry you had such a bad night. Fingers crossed that tonight's better!

appletini said...

That really sucks! :( I hope that your weekend is better :)

brookem said...

thanks ladies! the thing is, last night really was a good night! i had a lot of fun it was just a single wakeup call all over the place. and if it wasnt that, it was reminders of past stuff that really, is in the past for a reason you know?

tonight will be just rad, as im heading to an 80's party and all.

thanks for your kind words!

rookie teacher said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
jeorg said...

yep. we have all had that night. and then we have all had that night again. and then again. and maybe one more time. it just means that karma owes you a really good time.

Ally said...

I want to know who listens to Delilah on purpose!?

Hope you had a blast at the 80s party!

Airam said...

Enjoy your single life while you can as cheese as that sounds. I have a friend who is single as well and she said something to me that really made me think. She said, "I'm enjoying the solitude that comes with being single and doing the things I love without having to answer to anybody because I know that when I'm with someone, I won't have so much free time anymore."

Desiree said...

Great post! You are hilarious... and so real. Love that... and we all get you girl. ;)

brookem said...

jeorg- i love karma. i depend on it.

ally- haha, i know it right? the 80's party was SO fun. hope you're doing well in your last week before your big trip!

airam- it's so true. and i am. i do. most of the time. :)

desiree- thank you:) im glad you get it too!

k.r.i.s.t.e.n. said...

oh goodness..good for you for getting through that night! i don't think i would have made it.

and delilah - ha! i remember listening to her in high school on nights driving back from the movies or mall. totally forgot about her.

PeeJ said...

Horrible isn't it. The ex thing, this happened to me a while back with an email straight out of the blue. I always question the motives of exes who get back in touch after a long period of time. Being a horrible old cynic, I believe it's usually because they have thought of something they want from me rather than something they can do FOR me. That's not the way it's supposed to work. If you were an ex and you got back in touch because you want something that I'm not prepared to give you, there's the door don't let it hit your well padded arse on the way out :)

Peej
x

Double-A said...

Drunk IMs.

The new drunk dialing. :P

brookem said...

kristen- leave it to delilah to be there on one of these nights, right?!

peej- i have learned, at least from this particular ex, that no good can come of this continued communication. at least not now. probably not ever.

double a- is that a guiness you're holding! i love it.

e.b. said...

I feel like we have all been there like it is a rite of passage or something. It will make it that much more worth it when the guy comes alone - you will appreciate it and look back and remember.

The Exception said...

This was great. I can deal with all the happiness and engagements etc. What drives me crazy is when they start the " I know this guy..." or "Are yo u seeing anyone..." or "You really need..." *sigh*

Ruby said...

You got that slap in the face too? If it helps, I got that slap REPEATEDLY Saturday night...I'm a little bruised.
Hope you had a great weekend overall though!

brookem said...

eb- i do agree; it's all relative isn't it?

the exception- i know what you mean. though lately ive been pretty open to a setup, or something of the like. yet no good has really come from these situations yet. hmm.

ruby- im sorry to hear you got bruised! i did have a great weekend overall and hope you did as well!

Beth said...

That slap in the face seems to be a never-ending cycle for me. I know the feeling oh-so-well. But better to be single and happy and than coupled with the wrong guy and miserable.

Carrie said...

Oh my god brookem - what a night!!! Remembering those single times I can totally relate to the awkwardness of events out where you feel like an outsider because you're not plus one... even when you have one! And really, you can only talk to Jack Daniels or Alexander Keith for so long...

*hugs*