Monday, June 18, 2007

lately I'm beginning to find that when I drive myself my light is found

I love the time I have for myself on my drive to and from work each day. Lately with the nice weather I've been all about the sunroof open and windows down, music blaring. It's one of the only times each day, that I have, for just me. Time to think about life, or not. Time to zone out and listen to loud music. Sometimes even time to just have a quick, quiet cry, or if it's really a bad day, the ugly cry that Brandy and I have discussed. Mostly I just enjoy the me time, to have just for myself, by myself, each day. I look forward to it. I don't mind the 45 minutes it takes to get to work and back, and I seldom even mind the traffic. It relaxes me after flipping out in the morning when I forget if I turned my straightener off or not. It calms me after a stressful day with clients who have Tourette's and yell obscenities all over the place.

And for a Professional People Watcher like myself, I tend to notice the little things going around around me and I have to then rehash them to whoever will listen. Or to you guys.

To the man I see outside the little Indian market at the end of my street:
I'm sorry, but the socks and sandals combo is not really helping your cause. You look like a very nice man, you even sometimes smile at me as I drive by. This is why I think we should discuss this little minor issue. Socks and sandals, of any type, do not a good fashion statement make.
(And yes I am the authority on this issue. My best friend's name is Clinton and you can catch me on TLC on Friday nights.)

To the woman on the street a couple over from me who rakes the sand on her sidewalk every morning:
You are just adorable. Seriously. That little red sweater that you wear (albeit daily), even in 95 degree humidity, along with the red knee socks, is just too cute for words. My only request would be, that you perhaps invest in a broom. The rake just really grates on my ears. That sound on the sidewalk. It. Just. About. Kills. Me. So that's why I had Justin Timberlake blasting today. And I'm sorry that startled you.

To the man next to me on the highway, with the Italian flag dangling from your rearview mirror, along with what appears to be some sort of medallion?:
You need to take a picture. Don't stare while driving. In fact, don't stare in general, it's kind of rude. And it freaks me out, just a spec. You are wearing too many gold chains and your hair has more product that I care to see on anyone. Keep driving.

To the woman?/man? (I honestly couldn't tell), in the red Mazda 6, who was driving EIGHT MPH today:
Pick it the hell up! I understand on side streets one might slow down, say, enjoy the kids playing at the park, the flowers on the road. Or maybe you're lost and you're looking for a street sign. But honestly? Truly? Do you really need to go 8? MPH? It really irks me. And I know I enjoy my alone, me, car time, but really. Let's be honest here. By the time I'm three or four streets away from home, I'm done. I want out and I don't want to wait another 20 minutes to get home. Please tell me what route you plan to take in the future and I'll take a different one to avoid you. I'm sorry.

To the hot police officer who appears to be directing "traffic" outside of an office building on my alternate route home:
What's your schedule? I took your way home today and holy hell am I glad. You were looking quite sexy in your uniformed garb, golden tan, and appropriate sunglasses. If I knew that this was your beat I would have taken this route ages ago. It may be sad, but I'm hoping to be pulled over tomorrow, by you my dear. Bring it.

And lastly,
To the cute grandkids of my landlord who play in the driveway, daily, with chalk:
You're really really adorable. And I just want to smuggle you into my apartment to play with trucks together or watch Doug Funny with you guys. You're way too cute. It's sometimes overwhelming, your cuteness. And you make the end of a long day really worth it.

That is all blogbuds.
Oh wait. Micey was caught. That's right. In the basement. Trapped. Dead. In case you were all losing sleep over this, as I sure as hell have been. Let's hope his friends are all outa here now as well.

Four more days until the weekend.

44 comments:

armalicious said...

I love these! They are happy and annoyed at the same time! It's great that you could combine them!

You're totally going to speed through that alternate route tomorrow, aren't you?

Radioactive Tori said...

I am sad the mouse is dead, but happy it was caught and you don't have to worry about it anymore.

I agree with arm...speed through and if he pulls you over tell him you HAD to because your blog friends needed a good story. Do you have a cmaera phone? I'd like some photos of the hotness posted!

Anonymous said...

Okay seriously dude? What's the deal with hot cops/firemen/navy seals always being cute until they pull you over for speeding/rescue you from a fire/do what navy seals do and then it's always the least attractive and meanest human being alive? What is up with that? Why am I never pulled over by hot cop? Instead I get mean cop with two tight pants that clearly outline why he was picked on as a child. Okay, my rant is over.

megabrooke said...

arm- yes i will speed and hope for the best. i think i saw cuffs.

radioactive girl- i know, i wish he could have just been scooted out, not killed. i do have a camera phone, and perhaps can work some magic tomorrow.

brandy- i appreciate your rant. i got pulled over about a year ago buy a nasty ass cop and he was mean as hell. and unattractive. and hefty.

egan said...

8, 18, and 80. I'm noticing a trend here. 8 mph, 18 computers, and 80 mph in a 55. I see how this is playing out.

I kind of miss having a longer drive home to unwind. It's great to be home 10-15 after I shut my computer down, but sometimes I don't get to turn my brain off work mode. Ha, who am I kidding, I don't really work that hard... if at all. Maybe I shouldn't be admitting this in the event a co-worker of mine reads your blog. Holy hell, I've said too much.

I'm going as a cop for Halloween, not a "hefty" one though.

egan said...

By the way, I'm not really all that sad the mouse is dead. They carry diseases and shit.

Airam said...

This made me laugh so hard!! I get on a main road right away so don't have gems like these. And my drive isn't super long but I do enjoy it because it's against traffic both ways (woot!).

My favourite drives are the ones where I have no destination. I just get in my car and go.

armalicious said...

Oooh, cuffs! You're naughty!! And clever.

Egan just said "Holy Hell"...you're rubbing off on him, Brookem!

I agree with Efo...I'm not sad the mouse is dead either. My theory? If it's outside in it's own environment, then it's not cool to go looking to kill the thing. But once it comes in the house? All deals are off, yo. Same goes for spiders or any other fast moving bug. And if it's a shiny bug? Then, holy hell will that fucker be destroyed!!

JustRun said...

"If I'd have known this was your beat..." Too funnny!

I'm glad you're no longer living in mouse fear.

JustRun said...

By the way, the more N's you put in funny the funnier it is. Obviously.

Anonymous said...

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay the mouse is caught! It won't sneak in anymore! *shudder*
I do the cry in the car thing too..
I can't wait for the cop story once you get pulled over! Wear lip gloss!

Anonymous said...

It' fun to people watch and I do what you do...the self-commentary is fun...

Anonymous said...

sometimes i wonder how i make it to work i feel so terribly out of it on the drive. you on the other hand appear to be a morning person!

The Exception said...

I shared an umbrella with an adorable police man a few months ago (or he shared it with me). I wanted to go back and give him my number! ;)

I love the commute before and after work. Truly is a time to adjust and relax.

When does your mouse patrol (cat) arrive?

megabrooke said...

egan- love that you said holy hell. you should go as a cop, that will be sweet. not hefty, no way. i guess im workin the number 8 lately. 7 is my favorite.

egan again- im not sad either. ick. the question is, how did he get from the basement to roomies room to begin with? are there more? friends? eww.

airam- i love driving with no destination as well.

arm- clever indeed. ;) a shiny bug? what's that entail? eww again.

justrun- the fear is subsiding a spec. we're still a little nervous he hmay have some friends left behind.

justrun- clearly. funnn!

ruby- i have three lipglosses for the car only. im THAT obsessed. ill report in if there's a good story!

princess- people watching really is the bomb.

anne- im totally a morning person. not you?

Beth said...

I totally get the straightner thing. I obsess over whether or not I turned off the iron. At least once a week. I have even turned around on more than one occassion to check. And I have never left it on!

And hot cops- oh yeah! Big, big fan. Maybe it's something about a man in uniform...

And I'm glad micey is gone. You will sleep much better now!

Emily said...

Quite enjoyable.
I am mostly amused by the man/woman slow driver. Amused only because I didn't have to drive behind him/her. :)

I have a 45 min drive to work too -- and so often I encounter the same people along the way. That hour and a half of observing each day -- LOVE the people watching.

Accidentally Me said...

I will give you $20 to ask the Hot Police Officer out while you are driving home:-)

megabrooke said...

beth- it's totally about a man in uniform. at least for me.

undercover celeb- we are finding more and more things that we have in common. love that you love to people watch. and really, who doesnt?
(how many more days? 3??)

am- i will scope the scene today and see if he's there!

egan said...

Damn you and your "holy hells". They are totally rubbing off on me and I'm not sure if that's a good thing. I think a cop might be a fantastic idea, I could be Ponch's sidekick. You're not too young to get that reference are you?

megabrooke said...

egan- the holy hells can and should be your friend. it's a wonderful thing.

you and YOUR love for erik estrada! do you have a poster at work too, or just your bedroom?

egan said...

I have a signed photo of Erik Estrada at my desk. What, you want proof? Fine.

megabrooke said...

egan- you are out of control with the estrada obsession. yet, he wore a uniform, so i approve.

egan said...

I knew you'd see it my way. You know, I held his "credit card" in my hand once. And yes, you should be jealous.

Radioactive Tori said...

I forgot to comment that I used to have a next door neighbor that would call me at least once a week to run into her house and check her curling iron to make sure she turned it off. It was pretty funny, and got to be a fun running joke between us.

Anonymous said...

After checking out Estrada, I've decided I'm signing all my autographs with "Be Cool". So keep the autograph requests coming people, I'm signing them as fast as I can.

megabrooke said...

egan- im wicked wicked jealous. i think we need to discuss these details further. credit card handling?! man, you two are tight!

radioactive girl- i can totally feel her pain! i call my roommate at least once a week for this very reason. well, for the straightener, not so much the curling iron.

brandy- you rock. im in your fan club.

Airam said...

Congrats on your run tonight!

ReadItDaddy said...

Number 6 - every single day number 6 for me :)

peej
x

Anonymous said...

Oi, achei teu blog pelo google tá bem interessante gostei desse post. Quando der dá uma passada pelo meu blog, é sobre camisetas personalizadas, mostra passo a passo como criar uma camiseta personalizada bem maneira. Até mais.

megabrooke said...

airam- thank you lady! :)

peej- the grandkids one??

megabrooke said...

rodrigo- not sure what you just said?? but hi, and thanks for stopping by?

Kimberly said...

I like the song lyric title..my boyfriend (who also happens to be a police officer - and no, we didn't meet at a traffic stop) sings that with his band (and no, we didn't meet at one of his shows). Actually we met boringly at church. But I love it that I didn't know either of those things about him when we met...cuz I have a track record of uniforms and musicians and I probably would have run the other way.
Anyway I digress..I also identified with the "did I turn my straightener off" freak-out - my roommate has called me on a couple of occasions to check on that for her ;)
I only live 1 mile from work and I do miss the time to "decompress" during the drive home.
I enjoyed reading this!

megabrooke said...

kimberly!- you're like my idol. dating a man in uniform who is ALSO in a band. for reals?

egan said...

Someone is loco for Brookem.

megabrooke said...

egan- i had to go to some translator to understand that comment. i dont speak portuguese. in case you were wondering. loco!

Anonymous said...

Okay because I'm part detective when I'm not fingerpainting with youth, I translated your new boyfriends comments. And he wants to personalize your undershirt? Did I read that right?

megabrooke said...

brandy- i do believe you got that right. it's clearly my lucky day.

The Egg said...

Hot cops? Where does one find them? I'll be on the lookout.

Ally said...

I am loving the police officer description!

I used to have a nice country drive commute of about 35 minutes, and I found myself working out so much in my mind during that time. It was definitely a healthy side effect of living in a different town than my job.

Kimberly said...

Ha! It's even better that it was a total accident and I didn't know any of that when I first noticed him! (i guess you could say I have a TYPE)
He's one of the good ones though...a lot of times cops and musicians are jerks! but cute jerks...I hope if you meet this one he turns out to be like Mark.

Anonymous said...

Man! Lucky girl. The guy wants to personalize your undershirt. I just checked my spam folder and everyone wants to just give me bigger boobs or sell me a Rolex. You are indeed a lucky, lucky girl.

Appletini said...

I hate that 8 mph person! It is sooo frustrating and annoying ;p I'm happy that you're sleeping better now :)

Aaron said...

I was rootin' for the mouse. :(