on intruders, and ex boyfriends

I thought it was my worst nightmare come true. Because I'm very, very scared of burglars and things in the night, in the dark. Breakins and such. So when I got a text message, and a phone call, at 3am from my roommate, down the hall, I knew something was wrong. My heart raced, big time as I noticed the missed call. Woken out of a dead sleep, I picked up my cell phone off of my nightstand, flustered and not quite getting what was going on. Who the hell would be calling me right now? I didn't even have time to go through the list of possibilities, before a text message came through. She hadn't left a voicemail. I didn't even bother to read the text, I immediately called her back. No answer. Holy hell. Freakish scary things began going through my mind. I sat up straight in bed, hair in a wavy mess on top of my head, too warm from the humidy outside and having forgotten to open my window more.

She wasn't answering. I wasn't moving. Was someone in there? In our apartment, in her room? Did she call me in her only free minute to get away from some intruder? Oh my god. I was flipping out.
So I went to my inbox. Scrolled to the newest text.

"brookem i just saw a mouse oh man"

An intruder is right! I breathed a sigh of relief, in that moment, as I read the message. Because the intruder wasn't some bad bad man coming in with knives for fingers, or needles to inject my belly (because this does happen in real life, and clearly television gets the best of me). The intruder was of another sort. A small, furry? (are they furry?) sort.

So I finally made my way out of bed. This was all over the course of two minutes. This is dragging the drama out, but really, this is just how freaked I was by it all. Seriously. I don't do well with any type of intruder. (As if that wasn't apparent enough already.)

I made my way over to my roommates room, calling her name as I was walking towards her. No response. Holy hell, the mouse has gotten her. It's pitch black, I'm barefoot, I don't know where micey is, what if I encounter it? This is serious.

I get to her door, which I have to push open, as she has it barricaded now with Old Navy bags, shoes, and other paraphernalia. Because this will keep micey out, since she thinks she saw it leave.

She's in a ball on her bed. Fetal position style. I tip tow sprint to her bed. We both just look at each other. Seriously, in horror. Well where is it?! Are you sure you saw it? Did you hear it? What color is it? Did it wake you up?!

She was 95% sure she saw it. She had apparently woken up, looked towards her door, just in time to see sicko micey skrinkering away. Under her door. That nerve.

So now micey was on the loose, in the apartment. Out of her room, in the living room? The kitchen?
MY BEDROOM? No. It couldn't have gotten there already. Plus, my room is smaller, not as much hiding space there (or so I tell myself and roommate, now at 3:15am). We're trying to believe this. Micey is out of her room. She says she can't stay in her room. Alone. So we go back to my room. Flashlight in hand, two freaked out roommates, probably holding hands if I remember correctly, make their way across the apartment, back to my room. We hop in the bed. Fast. Cat like reflexes we get there that quick.

Of course we had to rehash all of this. How could this happen? Are we leaving cheese out? Why does he want to come in here? How did he get in? (Because by now, we just both knowingly determined it, is a he.)
"So you're sure you saw him??" "You're positive it's a mouse, right?" She thinks so. We're sweating now, anxious. Kind of laughing a spec too, because really, this would so happen to us. I decide to turn out the light, reluctantly. We don't hear anything, don't see anything, things seem safe enough at this point. We need to get some sleep, it's now almost 4am, we're getting up in mere hours.

"How do you feel?" I ask her. Because I know she was freaked. Oh god, not that I wasn't. But she is the one who encountered this intruder.

"I feel like I just saw an ex boyfriend. But this is worse."

And this, this is why I love this girl so much. No one else I know would come up with this so true connection. And I agreed wholeheartedly. This ensued a long winded conversation about ex boyfriends, to which we decided, we would prefer to see, encounter, the worst of the worst ex, over seeing this mouse on any day. We recalled boyfriends from the past, those that ended badly, those that didn't. Those that we still had feelings for maybe?, those that we were completely done with. And still, we concluded, seeing any of these men, over micey would be our total preference.

And that's pretty bad.

We finally got back to sleep. Kind of the one eye open type though. I got up at 6ish to run, and luckily didn't lay my eyes on any such micey beast. Thank GOD. Today, calls were made to Mr. Landlord, who says he will be supplying us with copious amounts of peanut butter, and traps. He wants to set up one in roommates room, to which we will, and are of course freaking out at the thought of. Co-workers tell me I just need to break this things neck. Which leaves me feeling so warm and fuzzy inside. Truly.

Holy hell to the day that we find this little sucker slammed down in a peanut butter mess. And you can be sure updates will be on the way.